Monthly Archives: April 2008

Yeechh words 2, or, mucus plug and membranes

Just say it out loud…muuuuuuucus pluuughhhh. One of the less-talked-about stages of labor and delivery. My highly scientific and thoroughly researched…ummm…research tells me that the losing of one’s plug can happen weeks before giving birth. WEEKS. And I am 40 … Continue reading

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Holy inappropriateness, batman

My daughter has turned into Kathy Griffin. At the Argentinean grill last night, as a buxom lady walked past the table: A: MOMMY! Look at the lady with the HUGE BOOBIES! (Gesticulating with her arms to indicate large, pendulous breasts) … Continue reading

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Ground control to Major Tom

So I figure the last posts before shooting a watermelon out your nether regions (or delivery, as I have heard it called) should traditionally be whine-fests, mostly about how huge I am and how uncomfortable I am and how I would … Continue reading

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For all you Khaydelyhinnes out there…

Have you seen any of the message boards on parent/baby sites about names? The boards are chock full of people giving their opinions about what to name one’s baby, and these people are are, each and every one of them, foaming at … Continue reading

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Gender dyslexia

I’m sure everyone has heard the story about the “man” who is pregnant, so I’ll not reiterate it here (it was on Oprah yesterday. Shut up! I was sick on the couch. It was either Miss Thang or Montel Williams. In retrospect, stabbing … Continue reading

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On ginger ale and eyelashes

Does anyone actually enjoy the flu? I think I might be one of those crazy psychos who actually does. Wait a minute…not in some clinical disorder-type way, like I enjoy projectile vomit or anything. Just for the record, 5 months … Continue reading

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